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  1. #1
    Chips's Avatar
    Chips is offline Private Member
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    Default Things to Ponder

    If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered **** or shoplifting?
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    Can you cry under water?
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    How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
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    Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
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    Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
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    Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
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    What disease did cured ham actually have?
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    How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
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    Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
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    If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
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    Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
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    Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
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    Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
    They're going to see you naked anyway.

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    Why is "bra"singular and "panties" plural?
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    Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
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    If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
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    Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?
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    If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
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    Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?
    They're both dogs!

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    If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
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    If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
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    If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
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    Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
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    Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
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    Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ass?
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    Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
    --
    "People who are unable to motivate themselves must be content with mediocrity." ~Andrew Carnegie~

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    Marit VS (24 November 2009), Renee (22 November 2009)

  3. #2
    pompeyrayuk's Avatar
    pompeyrayuk is offline Private Member
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    Default

    Wow you obviously got way to much spare time on your hands sir.

  4. #3
    thepokerkeep's Avatar
    thepokerkeep is offline Private Member
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    Default

    How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
    My favorite!
    Terry - The Pokerkeep
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  5. #4
    CK - Schalk's Avatar
    CK - Schalk is offline Public Member
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    Default

    If I ate myself, would I be twice as big, or disappear?

  6. The Following User Says Thank You to CK - Schalk For This Useful Post:

    Renee (24 November 2009)

  7. #5
    DaftDog's Avatar
    DaftDog is offline Private Member
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    Default Disappear

    Will a dog who chases his tail too fast disappear up his own arse-hole?

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    Renee (24 November 2009)

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